Better is better

I recently wrote a similar blog last week over at Catalyst, my Executive Coaching business’ page, on the value of embracing what’s called a Growth Mindset around pretty much everything and everywhere you are trying to make an impact or otherwise meaningful contribution. I’ll bring that same concept over here this week with the same intention of trying to show you how helpful that can be for all things Fatherhood.

 I started that blog relaying how one simple question posed to me long ago on a golf course changed my whole approach to thinking about skill, talent, and success. The TL:DR version is I used to take pride in being a really good self-taught golfer back in my younger days, especially when I was regularly beating all the guys who had spent a lot of money on fancy clubs, gimmicky accessories, and expensive lessons. I was content to measure my success in comparisons against other people, and quite happy with the results.

 However, this all changed one day when I encountered another golfer wilting against my game who asked me, as was usually the case, where I learned to play so well. Instead of complimenting my self-taught skills, he simply sighed when I told him I never had lessons and said, “Oh, that’s too bad. Imagine how much better you could have been if you got some lessons along the way?”

 Boom.

 That one question changed my life. Indeed, how much better could I have been if I had the wisdom to take some lessons along the way?

 I had been content to base my sense of success on how I compared to other people. But the real measure of success, the one that drives people onward to new heights, is how one stacks up against their own potential. In other words, how much better can you be on your own terms, not against a pack of people who don’t really matter in the long run.

 Fortunately, I was young enough at the time to take this unexpected lesson and run with it. I immediately changed my approach to my business, my relationships, and even my golf game, all of which were going well enough at the time, and began to ask myself how I could show up better across the board.

 So here’s my question to you: How much better do you think you could be as a partner, and as a Father too, if you bring a growth mindset into play and start to intentionally seek out lessons and learning opportunities to bring the best version of yourself to bear on these most important parts of your life?